That would be fine and dandy if he didn't seem that involved in the productions. But he does, and it seems the more he inserts himself the more ludicrous the video gets. And with that in mind, wouldn't we being doing you a disservice if we didn't do a comprehensive countdown? Well, probably not. But fuck it let's do it anyway.
Tier Five: Possibly Sort of Cool
Let's be clear, both of these are also pretty stupid. But they're not contrived. They're the sort of dumb that doesn't detract from your enjoyment, but might actually add to it. Kind of like a Will Ferrell movie if you haven't seen it too many times.
It should be noted these are two videos in which Zedd doesn't appear, and it's no coincidence. The man's acting (if that's what you'd prefer to call it) is not his forte. And as we venture further down the list, it makes you wonder why he--or his manager--is so heart set on having him in these videos in the first place.
Tier Four: Innocently Stupid
This one becomes more a Selena Gomez video, which results in a much blander and less ambitious rendition of the Zedd videos seen later. I've never quite understood how she keeps getting things to do. I mean, she can sort of sing, sort of dance, and sort of act, but is she better than mediocre at any one of these things? I have my doubts.
The DJ shows himself here, but only as a counterpoint to Gomez. He's such a fly on wall that he's literally buzzing around from place to place. Zedd often stays in the background during these videos, but it's hard to make an impact what you just vanish every time you're up on screen.
"Stay the Night" with Haley Williams (enjoy the Spanish subtitles)
Again, not enough going on here to be particularly upsetting. Although I will say seeing Paramore's lead singer participate in this endeavor was rather disheartening. No one needed this song; this wasn't a collaboration anyone was pining for. And I don't see how the tandem benefited either side.
The video leaves me asking the exact same questions. If the entire project only consists of a couple dancefighting it's not going to push the needle for me either way. But that's okay! At least it doesn't get overly ambitious and fall phenomenally flat, like everything else that lies ahead...
"Stay the Night" with Haley Williams (enjoy the Spanish subtitles)
The video leaves me asking the exact same questions. If the entire project only consists of a couple dancefighting it's not going to push the needle for me either way. But that's okay! At least it doesn't get overly ambitious and fall phenomenally flat, like everything else that lies ahead...
Tier Three: Downright Dumb
"Clarity" with Foxes
This is where I really begin to question who's pushing Zedd to show up in these videos. He's literally just standing there, staring into the abyss. And the video would've been perfectly fine without him.
It's actually a somewhat compelling story line about the dream illusions that take place when you're teetering on the edge of life and death. But it's ruined when the director shoehorns appearances byour enigmatic DJ and the song's featured singer.
Why couldn't the 2nd verse feature the two car crash victims chasing after each other? What did we really gain from supplanting the female crash victim with Foxes? I don't exactly know, and when it comes down to it, probably not much of anything.
"Spectrum" with Matthew Koma
Most of the time, the singer who joins Zedd is largely responsible for the idiocy going on. And I promise we'll tackle Koma in just a bit, but this one isn't his fault. This time you can blame the acid-riddled storyboarder who came up with this video concept.
We're supposed to believe this jamoke falls for a girl, discovers she's not of this world, and doesn't instantly freak out? Even though she's masking pitch black death eyes with a pair of sunglasses? Even though he's set to become a nationwide fugitive over a pseudo-woman he's known for a few hours? NOBODY THINKS LIKE THIS! And if you feel you do, it's time to get your head examined.
One thing this video does have going for it: definitively the best use of Zedd. The appearance is brief, but at least he's playing a key, succinct role within the plot. If only it occurred to people to use him this way all the time, then perhaps this article isn't possible.
Tier Two: Utterly Incomprehensible
"Break Free" with Ariana Grande
Technically not Zedd's track, but it's too glorious I just couldn't leave it out. I mean, who needs Star Wars when you have one of the biggest pop stars on the planet shooting down space monsters with special effects that look like they could have been invented before rock n' roll? And we have to respect Ariana for doing her own stunts. Or at least I hope she is, because no professional stunt double should be doing anything this amateurish.
And of course, what would the video be without a gratuitous appearance by the man, the myth, the legend himself...
...serving as the official DJ for an intergalactic space club? And if it is, that opens up a whole different rabbit hole of questions.
Why is there a dancefloor in the middle of a not-all-that-large spaceship that's supposed to be doing important work? Why is this purported club so well-lit? Does Zedd have any role in the space fighting, or is he being held hostage to make good background music for all of Grande's exploits? It almost turns him into a sympathetic figure, which cannot be said for this next atrocity...
"Beautiful Now" with Jon Bellion
Look at that face in the freeze frame. The concentration, the precision, the focus. Zedd's clearly up to some nefarious shit, in this case robbing a hapless convenience store owner with a knife for no particular reason. And if you think that decision was questionable, take a little time to ponder the rest of the video.
The fundamental problem with setting drama to a 4 minute song is that there's no time to contextualize what's going on. You can open up a thread of plot, but the only threads you can possibly tie up in that short a time are cartoonishly simple.
And naturally, instead of acknowledging that problem by stripping things down, this video decides to throw about four different plot threads onto a wall and to see what sticks. Here's a stunner: none of it does.
And of course, what would the video be without a gratuitous appearance by the man, the myth, the legend himself...
...serving as the official DJ for an intergalactic space club? And if it is, that opens up a whole different rabbit hole of questions.
Why is there a dancefloor in the middle of a not-all-that-large spaceship that's supposed to be doing important work? Why is this purported club so well-lit? Does Zedd have any role in the space fighting, or is he being held hostage to make good background music for all of Grande's exploits? It almost turns him into a sympathetic figure, which cannot be said for this next atrocity...
"Beautiful Now" with Jon Bellion
Look at that face in the freeze frame. The concentration, the precision, the focus. Zedd's clearly up to some nefarious shit, in this case robbing a hapless convenience store owner with a knife for no particular reason. And if you think that decision was questionable, take a little time to ponder the rest of the video.
The fundamental problem with setting drama to a 4 minute song is that there's no time to contextualize what's going on. You can open up a thread of plot, but the only threads you can possibly tie up in that short a time are cartoonishly simple.
And naturally, instead of acknowledging that problem by stripping things down, this video decides to throw about four different plot threads onto a wall and to see what sticks. Here's a stunner: none of it does.
Tier One: ?????????
"Find You" with Matthew Koma and Miriam Bryant
Wow. WTF has reached new heights here. Among all the valid candidates, this is the one that maximizes incoherence for both the musicians and the characters. One might say it even deserves a frame-by-frame breakdown to parse through all the confusion. And someone like me might respond to that request with an emphatic yes.
0:00-0:24 Okay. There's no way a sound that high-pitched is coming out of this Koma guy. He looks like the type who has half a pack of cigarettes for breakfast. Wikipedia may claim he's only 28, but the self-defeat in his eyes has clearly launched him into his mid 40s. Maybe he's stressed out by the young woman trying to drown herself in the tub?
0:30 Miriam Bryant looks like a a co-worker of mine if she were to grow out her hair and take a sniff of cocaine. That is all.
0:40 We get to the first drop. What in god's name is Koma trying to prove? He's strumming an electric guitar, even though there's not a single note in the song that sounds like it came from one. And even if there was, the guitar ISN'T PLUGGED INTO ANYTHING! What sorcery is this? Did Zedd let Koma sit in the corner and strum along to the track as he produced it? And did that somehow bleed into the music video? I've already lost my mind, and we're only 20% through.
0:58-1:37 A verse in the club. And obviously the only two people not having a good time are our two main characters. Seemingly because they're in love but it's not allowed here? Because there's no way a bunch of neo-hippies at a set by Zedd could possibly be accepting of a lesbian couple. If anything, it should be the perfect escape for the two of them to be together in peace but instead...
1:38-2:09 Obligatory sequence of somebody going fast in an EDM video. I've learned to accept these exist, but why do we need to hear the engine revving? It distracts us from the kind of decent music and instead puts our attention on the motorcycle on a highway. And if I want to see something go fast on a road, I'll watch a fucking BMW commercial.
2:10 So all of a sudden it's snowing? How far exactly did this woman travel? And if she knew how cold it would get, why is she so underdressed? How is she supposed to continue starring in this nonsensical video if she catches a cold? At least put on a winter hat...
2:00-3:10 We continue to follow the chronicles of Lesbian Narnia, interspersed with a few shots of the artists still playing unplugged instruments. You've sort of been lulled into a coma (Koma?) of idiocy at this point. I mean surely there's no way this gets any dumber. But oh wait...
3:11-Fin It was all a tub drowning dream! Let's end this 3.5 minutes of wasted time with one of the most overused tropes in the history of storytelling! Sure, one might argue that's a valid explanation for how crazy and rambling all the previous action was. But one would also be stretching farther than the Elastic Waistband.
Now believe it or not, after all that, I do think there's a moral to this story: don't try too hard with music videos. Just make them spontaneous and colorful and fun. There's no need to cram in confusing plots that will inevitably create so many gaping holes.
In short, if you're directing a music video, just do the exact opposite that Zedd is doing, and you should be fine!
1:38-2:09 Obligatory sequence of somebody going fast in an EDM video. I've learned to accept these exist, but why do we need to hear the engine revving? It distracts us from the kind of decent music and instead puts our attention on the motorcycle on a highway. And if I want to see something go fast on a road, I'll watch a fucking BMW commercial.
2:10 So all of a sudden it's snowing? How far exactly did this woman travel? And if she knew how cold it would get, why is she so underdressed? How is she supposed to continue starring in this nonsensical video if she catches a cold? At least put on a winter hat...
2:00-3:10 We continue to follow the chronicles of Lesbian Narnia, interspersed with a few shots of the artists still playing unplugged instruments. You've sort of been lulled into a coma (Koma?) of idiocy at this point. I mean surely there's no way this gets any dumber. But oh wait...
3:11-Fin It was all a tub drowning dream! Let's end this 3.5 minutes of wasted time with one of the most overused tropes in the history of storytelling! Sure, one might argue that's a valid explanation for how crazy and rambling all the previous action was. But one would also be stretching farther than the Elastic Waistband.
Now believe it or not, after all that, I do think there's a moral to this story: don't try too hard with music videos. Just make them spontaneous and colorful and fun. There's no need to cram in confusing plots that will inevitably create so many gaping holes.
In short, if you're directing a music video, just do the exact opposite that Zedd is doing, and you should be fine!
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